Hate me for telling the truth: outlawroad: duckwhatduck: outlawroad:I have never once, in all the...
I have never once, in all the months that this fucking ridiculous shit storm has been going on, seen a heteromantic asexual argue for their “oppression.” Ironically, it’s always the pissed off haters who resort to that word when they’re whining…
I have, oddly enough, heard quite a few arguments from heteroromantic asexuals claiming that they suffer the same oppression as those within the LGBT community, that because they’ve had to explain themselves over and over (and over and over and over) again, that it’s just as bad as having suffered alongside their LGBT peers. It’s a prevalent and co-optive attitude in at least a few circles, usually among younger individuals still looking for an identity.
I don’t think that a heteroromantic asexual is the exact same as a heterosexual, and I do try to make the distinction. However, heteroromantic asexuals still have “passing privilege”, in the sense that while the sexual desire isn’t there, they aren’t restricted by federal laws or subject to the same discrimination that those within the LGBT community face.
I’m saying this as someone who’s had it thrown back in my face that it’s impossible for me to be asexual, who’s run into a lot of ignorance on the subject, who’s been frustrated that my sexual identity has been erased, and that because I’m still romantically inclined towards those of the opposite gender that I’m “just Heterosexual and don’t have sex”. And I know that’s not the case. I DO understand the distinction, despite my flippant post.
I suppose telling someone they can’t identify as queer is presumptuous (though I didn’t say anything about pansexuals not “being allowed” to call themselves queer, as I was addressing those within my own peer group). But, it can be hurtful to someone who has experienced very real discrimination and oppression for being queer, to hear someone who’s been inconvenienced by erasure to include themselves in that umbrella, to treat having-to-explain as the same as not-being-afforded-the-same-rights.
As I’ve said before, I really was only specifically addressing the heteroromantic asexuals who have claimed to be oppressed- not even all heteroromantic asexuals. The ones who go bandying about how awfully mistreated they’ve been, and trying to compare it to the worst experiences of LGBT folk.
I shouldn’t have been as flippant, and saying “STFU” crossed a line, I think. I was just speaking out of frustration.
(Source: mloreley, via sw0rdkind)
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